Surgery #1 (Laparoscopy)

The idea of having surgery was quite daunting as it was my first one. I had to drink Coloprep the day before, which by the way tastes awful, never mind it’s purpose. I really don’t get why they don’t make it taste nicer to make up for your body’s reaction to it. Anyway, my mom took my to hospital and sat next to my bed for the whole 3 hours between being admitted and being taken in to surgery. She was crocheting all the way as she really dislikes hospitals. When the time came for the nurses to take me away I got this weird feeling. On the one hand my head was telling me to panic and that my heart needs to be racing, but on the other hand I was already oozy from the pill they gave me earlier. And then things just suddenly went dark.

The next thing I remember is being very cold and asking nurses for blankets. My mom was also there by my side when I eventually woke up, briefly. I remember wanting to go to the bathroom and a nurse helping me, it was probably the most helpless and confused that I every felt in my life. When I eventually got back in my bed my mom asked if she can go home for the night and I said yes and I almost immediately fell asleep again. I later woke up and realised that my shoulders were really sore. I buzzed for a nurse and she came to give me some sedatives, which helped a lot. I get why people can get addicted to it. The only other thing I remember is texting my sister at 11pm to ask her if she doesn’t want to bring me a chocolate if she was still up, she wasn’t so I had to go without my chocolate.

The next morning they wake you up way too early to ask if you want coffee or tea. I don’t think I even ever drank it. When the doctor came by doing her rounds, she didn’t have very good news for me. I could tell it from her face even before she said a word. She was very sympathetic and spoke to me in a calm voice, explaining to me what she saw. She said that I had Endometriosis level 4 and what they refer to as a frozen pelvis. Apparently my lower intestines were joint due to the endometrisi growing on the outside of my intestines in my pelvic area. She removed what she could during the laparoscopy, but there was too much to remove it all at once. The solution was to have the remainder removed surgically, which meant that I had to come in again for a laparotomy. But I had to give my consent first, which is why she didn’t just do it while she was busy. She also told me that from what she saw, she couldn’t believe that I was still functioning normally, and that I should actually be in pain 24/7. She also mentioned that my follopian tubes have been damaged due to the endometrisi that was removed caused scarring on the outside. I told her my stomach and shoulders were very painful. She explained to me that sometimes air gets left behind that they inflate your stomach with to make it easier for the laparoscopic equipment to move around during surgery. And that this would go away with time as it eventually “dissolves”.

The next 30 minutes felt like forever. I just wanted to get out of there. Even though I couldn’t really walk properly and all movement was at snails’ pace. They made me eat something before I was allowed to leave, and when my sister arrived to pick me up I couldn’t get out of there faster. Eventually we left with only a box of normal over the counter painkillers as per the prescription.

I didn’t care that I was walking out in my pajamas I just wanted to get home and crawl up in my bed and cry. I was just told the one thing that everybody assumes will happen, might not become a reality for me. And I wasn’t given a choice, I just have to deal with whatever comes next.

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